Paul Auster passed away last week. A friend married Paul Auster’s daughter and this, instead of Paul Auster’s writing, made him mean something to me. Funny how that works. At some point I read New York Trilogy. Long ago. Maybe in the early 2000s. I think I thought it was very good. Of course I’d say that now. When Paul Auster died I texted my friend, his son-in-law, and expressed my condolences. He was gracious enough to respond with an open heart. I listened to some interviews Terry Gross conducted with Paul Auster on Fresh Air. They talked about his writing a concise history of all the places he’s lived. All this - his passing, the interview about concise lists, my friends bereavement - has revived my interest in Paul Auster’s writing. I’ve made many lists in my time. Once, during a particularly bad break up with my wife (there have been a couple), I listed everything we owned together in our small apartment into a small, lined-paper notebook. This was around 2004. Later I’d make lists of this’ and thats’ in different places. Other notebooks. Blogs. In the Notes app on my iPhone. There is something satisfying at least, cleansing approaching best, about making lists of things. I have many friends who have been in Alcoholics Anonymous. As far as I can tell, AA is where the “gratitude journal” idea really took hold. And then the idea has been co-opted, and revised and evolved. I have friends who have never been to an AA meeting who keep a “gratitude journal” they write in, usually in the morning, if they remember. I have another idea. It’s a list of things you did during the day you’re proud of. Write these down at the end of the day, just before sleep. Things you did you’d like to repeat. Little things like picking up some trash in the park or holding a door for someone. Or bits of positive process you achieved like giving someone the “thumbs down” instead of flipping them the bird. The idea is to instill in yourself a wee bit of pride in your small bits of dignity and to set yourself up as your own role model. Here are some lists from the archives:
February, 2006 - Notes For Telemarketers
I watched the movie "Kamikaze Girls" last night and I think you ought to see it if you are feeling down.
I saw the sun set from observation deck of the Empire State Building on Friday.
I can never tell when my mobile phone is ringing.
I played soccer and hurt myself on Saturday.
I will miss the Winter Olympics while they are away.
My dog came back form her holiday last Wednesday and I spent all day yesterday petting her.
I drink espresso with whip cream in the morning.
I got my sweetheart's name tattoo'd on my chest.
I try to wear a different pair of shoes every day to keep my feet awake.
I like to take pictures.
I generally do not take cheese on my burger.
I do not think having a beer in the morning hours of that day is a big problem.
I try not to wear too much red.
March, 2006 - Things To Make Yourself More Aware
1. Breathe. Breathing stimulates nearly every sense in your body. It brings oxygen into your lungs and then into your blood system and to your brain. Deep breaths deeply breathed do even more of this sort of thing. Its awesome. Totally breathe.
2. When you walk down the street, look behind you a couple of times. Just see what's there. There might be people or an interesting accident you just missed or a just nothing at all. The most interesting would be nothing at all because then you would know that your grip on reality is either A) slipping, or B) suddenly greatly enhanced. Make sure you stretch first.
3. Drink caffeine. Caffeine really has a lot of caffeine in it and we all know what caffeine does. It really caffeinates. So drink something with heaps of caffeine in it and let your senses explode! (Hint: try caffeine with whipped cream.)
4. Pinch yourself. Hard. Thirty , maybe forty times.
5. Read the 3rd page of the A section in the New York Times. There is always an interesting international human interest story that will give you something to think about. I would say listen to NPR as well, but reading really stimulates the reading senses better.
6. Take a photo.
7. Do a hand stand.
8. Turn off all the lights in your office and hide under the desk. When someone walks into your room, flip on the light switch (hopefully you have the clapper) and yell "Surprise!" as loud as you can. This will greatly enhance your awareness of surprising people in unexpected and spectacular ways.
A.M. Spring Street Sightings
A girl wearing brown cowboy boots, navy blue tights under black bermuda shorts, a wide red belt over a navy blue sweater/jacket with a tan furry hood covering her head. Sightly bow legged. Not that interesting save the fact that she was obviously lost and trying to find a taxi, traversing from Bowery to Lafayette weaving a little like a crazy person. She found a taxi on Lafayette.
A girl heading to the 6 train going uptown wearing a black fuzzy jacket and tight lycra spandexy black pants with beige Ugg boots. She looked like she needed to be in Aspen or somewhere else where she could shoosh, not heading uptown.
A Realistic© 8 track recorder on the steps of the same place that we saw someone shooting up into his hand yesterday afternoon. The Realistic© 8 track recorder is now in my office. The guy shooting up is off somewhere having a bad day.
Two very pretty model types who didn't want to look at me.
Pavement and signs.
May, 2006 - Notes For Telemarketers
I like to watch boats and elevated subway trains.
July, 2006 - Words Weather Forecasters Ought to Use More
Gastrointestinal
Blight
Pistol-whip
Bigot
Poncey
Bland
August, 2006 - Things To Make Yourself More Aware
1. Look up. It may feel like you are a tourist gawking at the tops of them thar high buildins but really, you kind of are. Looking up, I mean way up, is really a treat. Once a day, on some mundane corner or route, take a look up. It feels great. Stretch first.
2. Buy a piece of fruit from a fruit vendor. Try to have exact change. In fact, if you don't have exact change, find out how much that piece of fruit is that you want and go get some exact change. When the vendor sells you the fruit, drop the change into the palm of his hand. Eat the piece of fruit.
3. Find a stick and bang on every bit of metal you pass. Just bang once, not too violently, so you can hear what it sounds like. There are a lot of different sounding bits of metal in the city: lamp posts, subway stair handrails, trash can lids, fences.
4. Stare at pretty girls. Brazenly. I mean, really really stare. Until you feel like a real dick. This goes for women too. Actually, it works a whole lot better for women to do this. Men already know the feeling perhaps too well.
September, 2006 - Blogs I’m Glad I Haven’t Written
My Baby Doesn't Have Jaundice
What's So Great About Prince?
The States I Am Missing From My Quarter Collection
I Don't Like Lime In My Mexican Beer
Magic Powers I Wish I Had
Reggae Is Great
Matte Vs. Semi-Gloss
Sigourney Weaver
Sadducees Are Better Than Pharisees
My Printer/ Scanner Combo Sucks
January, 2008 - Notes For Telemarketers
I've never had a job where I've had to wear a hardhat.
October, 2008 - Notes For Telemarketers
I am much more comfortable playing in defense.
Much more comfortable even, playing on the left side.
I generally prefer forks with relatively short tines.